Photo: Thomas M. Barwick/Getty Images My daughter was barely a year old when the queries started coming. Lately, it seems like people ask my husband and me more and more: When are we expanding our family? Our daughter will be 2 in July; I suppose the timing seems near perfect. “Eve is quite enough for now,” I’ve started saying. “Let’s see how the next few years go.” I don’t blame anyone who is curious about the prospect of a second baby, but I’ve never resented the question more than I do now. Eric and I were well aware that the state of the union was far from ideal before the 2016 election. We realized there would be agonizing conversations when our children reached a certain age: about where they can and can’t go and why, what they should and shouldn’t say, how to stay hyperaware and on guard in certain social situations. We knew that raising black children in America would be a uniquely heartbreaking and terrifying … [Read more...] about Am I Going to Have Another Baby?
When do i know gender of my baby
Photo: Compassionate Eye Foundation/Getty Images On planes, staring into clouds. On the subway, scrolling through Instagram. On the couch, watching alien movies with my partner. These are all places where I’ve caught myself drifting off into baby-naming land in my head. I’m not pregnant or trying to be yet, but I spend an inordinate amount of time pondering the names of my theoretical future children. Weird? Sure. Embarrassing? A little. Unusual? Nope. I’ve talked to people who didn’t just cop to name fantasies — many had lists of well-considered ideas in saved email drafts and on the tips of their tongues, just waiting to be shared with someone who asked. But even knowing that others do this too didn’t stop my wondering why I find myself conjuring up names, for hypothetical people. “Names filter into the air we breathe, so even when we’re not naming a child, we’re aware of it as a style-conscious choice,” said Abby Sandel, … [Read more...] about Why Can’t I Stop Dreaming of Baby Names?
When I was almost three months pregnant, I was desperate to keep my pregnancy private. That was five years ago, but I still remember how the wondering stares felt. During that time, every week of my pregnancy brought a new emotion and a new decision. The big ultrasound was scheduled at exactly three months in, and it was just around the corner. It would officially tell me the sex of the baby, and I was fairly certain I wanted to know. Still, every time I imagined having the procedure, the butterflies in my growing gut fluttered ― or maybe that was my baby working on his/her gymnastics skills. Did the butterflies mean it was another milestone I wasn’t ready to share? I hadn’t felt ready to tell people I’d been pregnant, either. I’d been surprised to discover that growing a baby felt so intimate. It was a deep and profound relationship the two of us were having inside my body. As a first time preggo, I was trying to find the balance between what … [Read more...] about Why I Refused To Give In To The Pressure To Have A Gender Reveal Party
SÃO PAULO, Brazil — “It’s a new era in Brazil: Boys wear blue and girls wear pink,” our new minister of women, family and human rights, Damares Alves, said this month in a video. And she didn’t stop there: Under the new government of President Jair Bolsonaro, she declared in her inaugural speech, “a girl will be a princess and a boy will be a prince.” Ms. Alves’s message was meant to be an attack on “gender ideology,” a concept created by conservatives to disparage the rhetoric of equal rights for women and L.G.B.T. people. The fight for gender equality and sexual and reproductive rights will lead to the collapse of the traditional family, Ms. Alves and others like her say. It will foster homosexuality and threaten Christian values. And so the correct response is moral panic: “Nobody will stop us from calling our girls princesses and our boys princes,” Ms. Alves fiercely proclaims. Except the conservatives … [Read more...] about I Put My Baby Daughter in Dinosaur Overalls. Am I an Anarchist?
Royalty is proving fruitful these days: Prince Harry and Duchess Meghan's news Monday that they expect a baby in the spring means another new cousin will join Queen Elizabeth II's growing gaggle of great-grandchildren. Soon, there will be eight little royals to delight the 92-year-old monarch and her husband, Prince Philip, 97. The news was announced by Kensington Palace just as Harry and Meghan were arriving to start their Down Under tour of Australia, New Zealand, Fiji and Tonga. This baby is going to be historic, says Victoria Arbiter, daughter of a former royal press secretary, who is now CNN's royals contributor. "There's no question he or she is going to be gorgeous and adorable, half-American and of mixed-race heritage, so what a time to be witnesses to the royal family and history," Arbiter says. "It does reflect on modern society: History is being made with this baby." What do we know so far? When is the baby arriving? Until January, the due … [Read more...] about What we know about Duchess Meghan and Prince Harry’s royal baby, due in the spring